Are You Ready ?

It Won't Come to This

So this Covid thing...

The media coverage is getting a bit much.  BUT, as a nurse I think it's important to be very aware and take precautions.  Do we need to panic?  No, not really.  BUT, as our scientists are madly working to figure this thing out it's important to listen.  I expect it to continue to wreak havoc in our country like we have seen in China, Italy and all across the globe.  It's even made it's way to "down under" in Australia as evidenced by Tom Hanks and his wife Rita Wilson.

Remember, viruses are birthed, grow, replicate and become stronger and stronger over time.  That's how Mother Nature works.  Survival of the Fittest.  Science is real.  And this particular strain has now figured out how to form a second strain.  It's a lot of DNA and RNA replication stuff that's too difficult to explain here but those of you who are the nerdy type will know what I'm talking about.  Yes...it's a mess. 

What's more frustrating for me is that our President Elect eliminated researchers, scientists and programs within the CDC who were well knowledged in such matters and even had warned him of a possible pandemic like we are seeing now is highly possible and we, as a country need to form a plan and protocol to keep in place.  He fired them and cut funding.  That was two years ago.  Now we have wide spread chaos.  Have you seen the pictures and videos from the Chicago O'Hare airport with the international passengers coming back home waiting to be "screened" ?  It's quite horrific.  I can't even imagine the pandemonium.  Not to mention we first got word about this Corona back in January.  Right around the time I flew up to Baltimore.  Large airport, masses of people.  It was on my mind then.  But our jackass of a leader waits two months to actually do something.  And now we are playing catch up.  Which rarely is successful. 

It all makes me so angry.  We could have done better.  We could have been prepared.  But our elected leaders fucked us up.  And I expect billions of dollars to be lost.  And our deficit to hit rock bottom because all those who have lost money will want some sort of federal bailout.  All from a virus. 

In the meantime, don't freak.  Take care of yourself.  Why do we need reminders to wash your hands?  When did we stop?  Spring is on the way.  Sunshine and happier days ahead!  This too shall pass.  Until next time...elizinashe

More of This Please !

Tomorrow Is Another Day

Question Is...When Do I Begin ?

Ah...Procrastination....I know who you are.  All too well.

How much do you procrastinate?  Or do you knock out your "to do" list every week?  Every day?  Always?  Or are you the last minute crunch kind of guy, running on adrenaline?  Like the rush do you?

I know I've written about this before.  Perhaps quite a few times.  It's a thing that haunts me.  Along with other things.  But alas...I procrastinate.  And then when I need to get things done it stresses me out because I waited too long.  I wish I were better at planning ahead.  Have no fear folks, I'm not in a complete bind.  Just fallen behind on the responsible duties which never ends.  But still...I'm a bit stressed. 

I read some time ago that the reason we procrastinate is because the task at hand is not a pleasant one.  A task or responsibilities that don't bring us satisfaction.  Or pleasure.  We procrastinate because it's associated with something negative, perhaps painful.  Or stressful.  PTSD maybe?  I'm not sure...but I know in my case I procrastinate because...well...for many reasons.  I guess it depends on the task.  Like cleaning.  Especially the bathroom.  Yuk.  Kitchen table?  It's a mess.  Car repairs?  I need a ride.  And if I have to leave my car for a day or two for the said repairs....then I'm screwed.  I need my wheels.  Work always returns.  That box I've been meaning to ship for the last three months?  Sigh...at least it's not time sensitive. 

So do you procrastinate?  How often?  And what do you procrastinate about?  What's your excuse?  Curious minds want to know...until next time...elizinashe.

Yep. 

It's One of Those Nights

Starry Starry Night

I'm coming off of a long stretch of work.  It's nice that I don't have to go back until next week.  I need the break.  I keep telling myself I should pick up an extra shift like I used to, or at least a half shift.  I'm not desperate for the money but it sure does help.  Plus, I need things.  Like a new couch.  But alas....I just can't bring myself to do it.  I need my time away.

I'm tired and a bit achy.  I know I'm fighting a bit of a head cold too, but I just can't fall asleep yet.  My mind is too busy.  I've got a few worries swirling in my head and it's difficult to filter out.  I have lots of "catching up" to do house wise, food wise, laundry and bed linen wise and oh...I think there is something wrong with my car.  Great timing, eh?

I know it will get done.  At least the majority of it but all that is swirling in my head too.  Sometimes I really hate tackling all of this shit called Life by myself.  And I'm afraid it will always be that way.  I really don't have much hope for a solid or lasting relationship.  Not that I need one to complete my existence or make me "feel whole" but it sure does suck not having an extra anchor if you know what I mean. 

So here I sit, typing away...snacking on a breakfast bowl and a glass of wine because that sounded like a good idea for a slightly hungry belly and perhaps a segue to induce sleep.  It really doesn't matter that I'm up this late.  What duties I need to accomplish tomorrow really doesn't have a timeline.  As long as I am home by dark.  My night vision isn't so great and I really hate driving when it's really dark.  Ahh...the joys of aging.  Amongst other things.  And so you have it my readers, whoever you may be.  A restless, worried mind in the wee hours before dawn.  Sometimes I think I will always be this way.  And if that's the case, then so be it.  As long as I have this gig I think I'll be okay.  Until next time...elizinashe.

I Need to Practice This More

Which Type Are You ?

Is It Quiet in Space ?

How much alone time do you need?  Are you one of those independent types who don't need  a busy social life?  Or are you one of those more dependent types that need your calendar all filled up with friends and activities? 

Introvert or Extrovert?  Maybe a blend of both?  Social anxiety?  Or a leader among your pack?

I think I'm a bit of a blend of social and anti-social.  An introverted extrovert perhaps? 

The last couple of weeks have been a flurry of activity.  But in a good way.  But sheesh...am I glad to be home alone tonight.  I needed some down time after my errands and a quick chat with my neighbor.  Work beckons and sometimes that can be really draining.  And I expect it to be exactly that.  So much is going on these days....people are making some noise and our "for profit" hospital is feeling the heat so to speak.  I kind of like that to be honest.  Sound off your horns I say!

In short, the last couple of weeks have been filled with friends, wine, laughter and much to my surprise very little stress around it all.  I was able to help a friend in great need, have a special peep stay due to bad weather and spend some time with another friend from long ago who was in town on business.  And the coolest thing about it for me was that I finally have a place to call home and a lovely guest area for the above said friends and future guests.  I may not have a lot and I may have some clutter piles, dust bunnies and disorganized bins but your real peeps really don't care.  What I have learned is that all they want is your time.  And that's good enough for me.  I'm glad they get my kind of crazy and my kind of style.  Forget being all primp and proper.  Who needs that?

So tonight was spent making a nice dinner for me, a couple glasses of wine and lounging in my pjs' and bathrobe.  I really know how to channel that inner "little ol' lady".  And I relish that.  Perhaps I should give my aging alter ego a name.  How about Gladys?  Sounds silly enough.

I know the next few nights will bring its normal chaos.  And I know my coming short time off will be spent quietly at home before I begin the work cycle again.  And then it will be more time to be quiet.  I know I will need it.  Unless something more festive comes my way....you gotta get out and play at some point, right?  Until next time...elizinashe. 

Love Yourself First

Look To The Helpers

It's Good to Share !

Do you ever wonder what your purpose in Life may be?  Do you know your calling?  Have you always known what your career/life path would be?  Have you pursued your original intent?  Or have you just "winged it" and fallen into whatever Life threw at you? 

I've always been willing to help others.  Not all the time, but when I know in my gut, it is the right thing to do not to mention that I have zero problem in doing so, I really don't hesitate to offer whatever help I can muster.  Sometimes I wish I could do more, especially for our community and our country.  Regardless...I like to help. Maybe it's my own journey that I have taken that has lead me to where I am today? 

It struck me earlier today that in the last few years, since I have bought my home, I have been "that helper" to friends in need when the time arose.  I never in my life thought I'd have the life that I have.  I sometimes wish I could afford to do more but alas, that is not the case.  However, the idea of "being that friend" who helps her peeps when they are in a last minute pickle might be one reason that I am here on this planet of ours.  Perhaps that is in the least, one purpose as to why I am here.

I helped one of my very special peeps and provided some housing after a sudden illness when she and her son was out camping.  I did not have a guest bed yet, but a futon, a warm home and a hot shower.  It was the wee hours of the night and luckily when I was away from work.  I have also housed a friend who was mentally ill and needed a warm place to stay and food to eat.  Thankfully that was short lived but I could not bear the idea of my friend being so ill and sleeping in the woods.  I did what I could and I know he was grateful. 

I have housed another very special peep and coworker during our snow events as she is unable to get home when it does snow.  We have a wonderful time together, she's a great co-pilot as I am the one who drives us to work and we always have plenty of food and "adult beverages" available.  I love my snow events with her.  Really.  As stressful as driving in the snow can be, we really do have fun together.

The last two nights, I have helped another friend who needed a place to stay as she has had a bear enter her home the last two nights.  Yes...a bear.  Inside her home.  When she began to text me, I did not hesitate to tell her she can crash here until the proper authorities can do their thing and remove the bear from her property.  I know it's been stressful for her, my guest room is still clean and I had time away from work to be available.  Perfect timing?  Or is that a purpose?

Regardless, I am glad I am in a position that I can be "that person".  I can't do it all the time, especially with my work schedule but I do find it ironic that it always seems to happen when I am off work, which is a bonus.  Maybe that's the way it's supposed to be?  I don't know.

So maybe...I am a Helper.  It doesn't pay a whole helluva lot but the reward is fulfilling.  I think that's good enough don't you?  Until next time...elizinashe

Share Your Heart !

Yep, It's Monday

Which Door Do You Choose ?

Today has been a mixed bag.  After much rain and one beautiful day, the skies turned gray once again with the promise of more rain.  Ugh...

Today has been riddled with indecisiveness.  I was not in the mood to cook and although as much as I wanted to go to my watering hole for some social time, the impending college football game kept me at bay.  Food wise, nothing sounded good.  Or healthy.  However after a quick trip to my regular grocery for some basics, and the thought of an overpriced chicken pot pie, which I did buy anyway, I decided on a couple of slices of pizza-at another store.  I really need to do better food choice wise in my off time.  Sigh...

I had done some quick shoe shopping too earlier in the day as I am in desperate need of some new shoes.  I found a style that I really, really liked-however they did not have my size.  Which happens a lot.  And I mean like all. the. time.  Thus, why I hate shoe shopping.  And clothes.  I run into the same damn problem.  Go on line you say?  I did.  And found them I did.  But...upon closer inspection, they were not the exact style I thought they were.  Fuck.  And I can't cancel my order just yet.  Guess I'll find out if I really do like this style better or worse compared to what I saw earlier today.  Next week that is when they are delivered to my doorstep.  Or maybe it will be the following week.  Who knows.  Sigh...

It's just been a frustrating day in general.  It is Monday.  I'll blame it all on the day.  Or the weather.  Maybe hormones.  I don't know.  I just can't decide.  Until next time...elizinashe.

Hoping for a Better Days Ahead

Hello 2020 !

Fancy Drinks for 2020 !

Happy New Year! 

Well the New Year started off with quite a bang.  Literally.  Not so sure how great that is.  Keeping my fingers crossed that the coming months will be safe and sound.  But my expectations are more realistic. 

So what did you do on New Year's Eve?  Stay home or go out?  Did you stay up to "watch the ball drop"?  Did you get kissed? What did you do for New Year's Day?   Did you do a traditional New Year's day meal?  Or was it more of a bloody mary/hangover food kind of gig?  Football?  Or did you play outside?  Skiing? 

I took some time away from work after Christmas.  I've had about 11 days off at this point.  Tomorrow starts another leg of three nights and then I"m off again for the weekend.  Squee!  I have enjoyed every single inch of my time away from work.  I was way past due for extra time away.  I must remember to plan better and take more vacation time ~ but work...that's a whole other story. 

I've managed to replace my kitchen light fixture that I have hated so very much, rented a couple of movies, started to purge the closets and box up some junk that I really don't need with a plan for a very near future drop off to the Goodwill.  I even cleaned up the house a bit, played on my piano and started off 2020 with a night out with special friends and fun pictures.  I hope to have more nights like that this year.  It certainly was good for my soul.   I even bought myself a little Art piece that made me happy.  Now I want to pick up a couple of other Art pieces that I have desired for quite some time and add it to my wall.  I have a theme in mind...

Not a bad way to kick off the new decade don't ya think?  When I reflect on what the last ten years of my life, well...it sure has been a long, long journey.  Wow...what a long strange trip it's been.  Wonder what the next ten years has in store for me.  Until next time...elizinashe

Keep Shining !