Family Friends

My mother has a long time girlfriend coming into town next week for a visit. I thought she was already here as my mother & I had planned to get together Friday (today ) so we all could visit but I had dates wrong, regardless I will be joining them next week for a gab. However I have mixed feelings about this and I didn't realize how much 'stuff' I had leftover in my brain until I went to sleep last night, or at least attempted to sleep. Some of it was leftover anger and painful memories and the other was the benedryl funk that kept me lazy all day and then perked me up at night.

Anyway, this woman and her husband and fraternal twins were the one constant in our household for get-togethers, cookouts, church stuff and ultimately our rock when my brother died. I was the one who was asked to call Betty that afternoon when we were in the ER after we had gotten the call that my brother was brought into the hospital after he had collapsed at work. We had no idea what was going on or why he was rushed into the ER. He had passed out at work and his co-workers started CPR until the ambulance came and carted him off. The doctors kept telling us that they were doing everything that they could do, trying to revive him but he had not responded to anything. Betty arrived shortly after they told us that my brother was dead. She was the one I grabbed and sobbed into her shoulder after I saw him for the last time.

It was such a long time ago. I don't know if I have truly gotten over my brother's unexpected death. I think I've just learned to live with it. And perhaps ignoring some of the other stuff b/c it's just too damn painful. Betty & her family were the ones who was with us the whole way. That first Christmas after his death was a real doozie. We all went to his grave after the evening church service. That was one of the last times I went to his marker. I just couldn't stand there without falling apart.

The following spring our friends moved to Kansas so her husband could take another job. That was a sad time but understandable. I was pretty close to their daughter Kathy even before my brother had died. We had become pretty close friends and having Kathy around meant alot to me that summer. It really sucked when she moved. Looking back on it all I guess it left me feeling abandoned. And understandably so. My other friends didn't know what to do with me, but hell we were all about 15 years old. How much wisdom do you have at that age?

We kept in touch over the years and made frequent trips to Kansas so we could visit. It was always a good time. Unfortunately Kathy & I became more distant in our college years for whatever reason. We still send birthday cards & Christmas gifts but it feels more like out of habit instead of...whatever it should be. I hear more about her life through the 'mom grapevine' than I do from Kathy herself but I know that's not because she doesn't want to end our friendship, her life has been quite chaotic at times and keeps a very busy job. It's just the way it is I guess. Betty & my mother have remained constant friends and they have a strong bond. They haven't seen each other in over 10 years I guess. I'm really happy for my mother that she will be reunited with a long time girlfriend, she deserves that by all means. And I know I will be happy to see her as well but I'm bracing myself for those bittersweet emotions that will rear it's ugly head. I'm kind of relieved that our reunion isn't happening today. I just don't think I could handle it. Maybe next week I'll have a more peaceful attitude and all those painful memories will melt away with that first reunion hug. elizinashe

Nothing in Particular

Don't have too much to say. I've had many ideas to post but the beginnings usually come to mind when I lie down for a good night's rest before I must get up. I tell myself that I'll remember when I get home from work the next day and write it all up once I get home but I never really do. Oh well...
But to continue with the Mother Earth blog there have been at least 2 other earthquakes around the globe that have ranked close to 7's on the Rictor Scale along with some sinkholes, more rockslides and something else that I have forgotten but I'm sure that I'll remember the other when I go to bed this eve. haha...
Spring is here and has lifted my mood greatly. I didn't realize how much winter really affected me this year until the sun finally started to stay out later and the trees started to green up. I'm so much happier and less ill tempered at work lately. Must be that vitamin D shining through the skies. ahh....
I 've got a bit of a crush on this guy at work. He works in the EKG department but alas no real date yet. I think he's gay but it hasn't stopped my co-workers from teasing me about it all. I guess I'm getting paid back for all the teasing I've done to them. Turn about it fair play. I really don't see much progress out of this flirtation so it's back to the dateless singlehood. yee-ha.
I went out dancing a few weeks back and man did it feel good!! I actually stayed out until 2am having a few drinks and dancing to some good old-fashioned 80s music. College days revisited. It made me realize how much I really missed being able to stay out late and not having to worry about getting up so damn early for work. It was a really good night for all. I hope to do a repeat when I have an opportunity to do so. Dancing the night away is always good for the soul.
So that's about it. Not going to revamp this post or check my grammar & spelling. Just a quick post about nothing in particular. elizinashe

Mother Earth

Remember those old 70's Parkay Margarine commercials that ended with the quote "It's not nice to fool Mother Nature" ? Well, looking back at this past season of unusual weather I think we have pissed Mother Nature off.

Our weather here has been quite unusual. We had a very wet winter last year, a wet spring, a rainy summer, a damp fall and our winter season blasted in on December 18th. It's been a helluva ride this year. Saturday was a beautiful 'first day of spring' and yesterday was gray and cold again. Today we've got spotty showers, a chill in the air and some stray snowflakes that melt as soon as they land. Sheesh!

But the weather all across the globe has been unusual. There have been numerous mudslides, many rockslides in our area, a lot of rain followed by flooding & loads of snow. (and I do mean loads!) I think the first snowstorm hit the midwest states before the holidays which shut down many an airport all across the states, stranding many peeps in an airport for days as they were trying to make their holiday mecca. And then the blizzards kept coming. Snow drifts higher than a grown man, numerous power outages, stranded folks and travelers alike and many school days cancelled. And now that winter is slowly leaving the jet streams, the midwest is now battling flood waters again, the northeast got hammered with a pre-spring storm toppling trees and power lines in a 3 state area a couple of weeks ago and my hometown area got slapped with a little more snow just this past couple of days. There have been earth quakes in Hati, Chile, Taiwan, Turkey and a small shaker in LA just last week. (or at least I think it was last week.)

Wow! That's a lot in a year's time. So my question is what did we do to piss off Mother Nature so bad? She must be really mad. Maybe she's going through menopause. Geeze I hope she gets happy again. elizinashe

Time Off

I took some time off from work this week mostly so I can use some of my PTO and go to a concert without the worry of having to get up at the crack of dawn and work sluggishly for 12 hours. My working environment had been getting on my very last nerve so last month when schedule requests came in for this month I just went ahead and marked this week off so I wouldn't have to worry about it. Although I did not go out of town as most people do when they take PTO I have enjoyed my unplanned week.
It's been a rather productively lazy week. I've met some girlfriends for chicken wings, stayed in my pjs until noon, went to a meeting for a work related school thing, met my mother for lunch, started a Goodwill box, went to see a concert with a girlfriend who treated me to a ticket, started on some paperwork for scholarships just in case I make it to nursing school, spent the first day of spring downtown with another friend and have stayed up late watching tv. All in all it's been a good week. I didn't start everything that I had planned like I wanted but I really can't complain. Tomorrow is another day. I can finish up school stuff and begin that exercise program that I keep promising to start as well as posting more blogs that I have dancing in my head in the wee hours of the night. I have one more night of freedom before I have to get back into the work mode and wake up at the crack of dawn. I can't wait until my next PTO. I have loved this week of random nothingness. It was good for my soul. elizinashe

The Point is Moot

So I had a nice little post earlier today along with what would be considered a poem to go along with my post. Just some random stuff I had running through my head as the Benadryl was wearing off. But alas, after many attempts for some reason I kept getting some 'unable to post' dialog box saying that something was not readable or something along that lines. I tried many different ways, even starting from scratch and starting all over again but still, it would not allow me to post. Maybe I'm just not supposed to post that particular blog for public viewing. I'm over it now. The feeling is gone. It's a moot point now. Maybe next time. elizinashe.

Fashion Week

It's Fashion Week Ya'll!! One of my favorite topics to blog. Oh my, isn't this a doozie? Um...what can one say about these two? Apparently a wrap of dead rats around the shoulders and a cube over the head with tattered sleeves is high fashion this year. I may be in luck. I have a lot of clothes with tatters and holes in them. I wonder if pen ink stains is trendy this year. I have those too.

But wait! There's more! Here we have a few other hot items to admire. I spy a Batman fan, I spy a fan of healthy red blood cells, I spy Humpty Dumpty's widow, I spy a terrible drag queen paying homage to Carmen Miranda, I spy a really bad German art flick actor, I spy a sad art house Mickey Mouse Club kid.

Now I know these get-ups are merely just a way of making an over exaggerated statement on how creative each designer can be, however these designers are supposed to be stylists which no matter how over-the-top all this may be, I see no style whatsoever. It just looks stupid and impractical and yet somehow all these get-ups influence the trend on what really will hit the streets for us normal peeps. For those of you who have seen 'The Devil Wears Prada' will remember Meryl Streep explaining to her homely secretary on how one little belt influences on what we buy at Sears. (whatever.) So I'm guessing that the trend will be lots of dark colors, slim fits and strange hats. I guess I better start throwing out all my cheery colors out of the closet. I wouldn't want to be out of style. ;) elizinashe

TMI

There are some products out on the market that I just refuse to buy. You can find a carrying case for just about anything you want. Money, makeup, lipstick, credit cards, cigars, cigarettes and yes tampons. Give me a break!

Now the last thing I want to 'show' the world as I make my way to the ladies room is that I'm in that 'special place', although there ain't nothing special about it. I don't care how stylish the carrying case might be ( such as sparkles ) or what the creator deems as clever (such as 'Go with the Flow', or the 'PMS Queen') crammed full of tampons as I make my way to do my business. And I am almost certain that my peers and strangers in a restaurant or any other public place would not want to know what I'm doing in the ladies room even if I do have a trendy & stylish carrying case for my personal business. Being in that 'special place' is not pleasant. You're tired, cranky, bloated and it is usually followed by a few hours of cramps. Why would I want to brag about that by carrying a freakin' tampon case? I'm just saying. That's just too much information. elizinashe