A Little Something I Wrote

 Hello…it’s been a long, long time.  
Yep, I’m still here.  
Are you?

Sharing a little thing I wrote back in May when I was struggling.
I am in a much better place now.  And have been for quite some time.
And I am glad for that.  

So I thought I’d share as I meant to post this much much sooner.  
But Life got in the way.

Hope you enjoy.  

To The One Who Left

I hope you are well.
Thanks for the time.
Go figure your shit out.
I refuse to be in limbo.

My heart can’t take it.
Can yours?

Why are you so afraid?
What was I to you?
You won’t change, that I know.
So what was your purpose?
What was our purpose?
What am I to you?
My heart has grown cold

I don’t know if it will ever warm back up.

I hope I am wrong.

To The One Who Left

You left too soon.
Why can’t you be here?
Can you see me?
Are still behind me?
Protecting me?
Where would you be if you had not died.

Oh how my mind thinks of that
You would tease me about loving Dave so much

And bitch about my smoking

Memories are fading with time
But I will never forget you.

To The One Who Left

Well shit.
You were a big one.
I had to put on the really big girl pants
And it sucked.
But I am glad it was me
I just wasn’t ready.

Were you?
Why did you keep so much shit?
Seriously.
Please send someone to help.

Do remember our last talks?
Do you remember what I said?
Did you understand?


What was it that you did not tell me?
You knew something was up didn’t you?
I knew you knew something
I wish you had told me

I wish a lot of things.

To The Ones Who Left

Don’t leave me hanging
I still need you
And I will need your help as my Life continues

I still Love you
I still wish you were here
My heart still hurts

To The Ones Who Left

Why did you have to leave?
It was too soon.

My heart is forever changed.
I hope I find it again.

Self Care

Practicing This Today...

 Do you practice "Self Care?".  

Do you know what that really means?  

Taking time just for you. Taking time just to decompress.  Taking time to have a Peace of Mind and do something that brings you back down to Earth.  Do you know what I mean?  

Do you allow yourself such time in our busy lives?  Got kids?  Got a spouse or a partner?  Work?  Have you over extended yourself in all of your activities and volunteering?  

Have you stopped to just rest?  

Although I have been off work the last few days they haven't been happy ones.  Seems like there was something every day that needed tending to and not the fun kind.  It sure did become exhausting.  

I cancelled an appointment I had this afternoon, ran a few necessary errands and came home to rainy skies and a few rumbles of thunder.  I slowly tackled the kitchen and even wrote one of my cousins a letter.  And I pre-ordered a book that another cousin has written.  All the while listening to music and taking all the time I needed. 

 No need to rush around. No deadlines so why be in a hurry?  

I so needed a day like today.  My house is still  a wreck but I made a nice plate of tacos with all the perks and had some chilled wine to wash it all down.  And it was exactly what I needed today. 

Sometimes the only way I can recharge my soul is to hermit, play some tunes and take my time with clearing up the clutter not only in the physical sense but also  in the mental sense.  

You just can't put a price on a day like that~

I hope you know how to take some time for your own Self Care.  It's so important.  

Work beckons this weekend but there is a music show on the calendar for Sunday evening.  Although I know I will be tired a good live music show will certainly perk up my bones and fill my soul.  

And that will be a great way to wrap up my working weekend. 

Until next time...elizinashe

Take Care of You !

A Little Ditty

 Found a little something  wrote late one night back in August.  

So I thought I'd share it here. 

Hope you like it. 

Bits and Tits

Angry Bits
Angry Tits

You can go ahead and Kiss My Grits

Who the Fuck gives a Shit?

You think I’m Strong?

Well, Yes…Yes I Am!

But do beware of the “strong ones”
They too need to Roar
They too need to be Seen and Heard

They too break down

And all too often the shattered pieces remain all over the floor
And all too often people just keep walking by as if nothing happened.

I ain’t no Humpty Dumpty
I ain’t no Princess either

I don’t need no Fairy Fucking Godmother
Or some Prince Charming

What I need is a solid landing
Because this chic is tired of sliding about.
 

 

Monday Monday...

 Bah-da bah-da-da-da....

It's one of those days. 

 Does Monday make you think of that Mama's and Papa's song?  

Or is it just on those melancholy days?  

Today is a lazy day for me.  The sun is out and thankfully so.  I need some sunshine and I like the warm glow it gives me when I sit outside.  Not too chilly either so outside time is not so bad.  I like the gentle warming it gives my achy bones. 

Lots to write but hard to focus.  I have a good post about grief that I need to clean up and publish here.  So much to discuss about grief and yet....we really don't talk about it now do we?  

Maybe I've been talking to the wrong people.  Maybe not. 

Regardless, I hope the sun is out shining brightly out your way.  We still have a way to go for the Winter season to end but I will take this day and embrace it for all it's worth.  And with that said, I will leave you with a quote that struck me as something important to say, remember and share.  I hope you like it. 

"You can't fix me, but you can hold my hand while I fix myself. " 

Until next time...elizinashe. 

New Year New You

A Toast to You !

 Happy New Year! 

A few days late that is..oops! 

So did you celebrate?  Did you watch the Ball Drop?  Did you get a kiss? 

I like New Year's Eve.  I don't go out and party although I have done so in the very distant past, but these days, I like to be in my old lady clothes, sipping on some wine and eating snacks from the comfort of my messy home.  No crowds and I always have access to the bathroom.  No waiting lines there! 

I'm not one much for making "resolutions".  I never stick  with them anyway.  Do you?

 

I just try and take it day by day.  And as of late that is all I can do.  Holiday Hangover Blues anyone?  But I do hope and will make a most fervent effort to get to the beach, take another real vacation and work on getting my basement cleared out and my house back in order.  I might need some helpers in that department.  

 

Anyone make a resolution to help others?  I know someone who could use an extra pair of helping hands.  haha...until next time...elizinashe.

I'm Coming to Get Ya Beach Time !