Night Shift

So I picked up a night shift tonight due to one of our crew is home sick with the flu. I could use the overtime, plus it would 'force' me into studying being that I have alot of time to kill until 7am. I've written a few notes and looked at some stuff that our teacher has posted on-line, but I'm still not feeling the study habits. I really don't have the motivation to study tonight. Or ever for that matter.(at least this week.) I just hate doing it. I hope that is normal. It's just a little hard to get started and focus on what I need to be doing instead of farting around and becoming so easily distracted. It's really made me question my endurance school-wise. Perhaps I'm just one of those people who doesn't do well in school...I'm not quite sure what the root of my problem is. Although I have a pretty good idea where it stems from.(can't change that one.) It's made me feel poopy about myself and quite guilty. I'm beginning to question my real purpose here and where do I really want to go with my new career endeavor. How do you know what you want to do in life and how do you really achieve it? How long does it take for a person to get where they want to be in life? All of this is normal adult growing pains, right? Why couldn't I have been one of those type A career focused corporate ladder personalities creating my own company and living a jet-set life? Is there a life manual that I don't know about?? I suppose I could go into fashion and create something more ridiculous than my previous two posts and make a name for myself...ha-ha!! Maybe in my next life...hopefully these growing pains will pass quickly...wish me luck. elizinashe